Pretending all the way.


Apr 23, 2014
@ 7:27 pm

Every Now and Then

Every now and then I get overtaken by the urge to just stop what I’m doing and cry.

It’s like I suddenly realise something, but can’t quite wrap my mind around what it is.

I don’t know if I’ll ever understand it.

I don’t know if I ever want to.

Maybe I’ll just cry instead.


Apr 23, 2014
@ 7:13 pm


I’m on twitter now, so if any of you guys are also, please follow me, I’m especially looking for other writers and artists to follow so many of you would be the perfect place to start!


Apr 21, 2014
@ 8:50 pm


In the crumbling of worlds 
And in the tumbling of nations 
We all watch skylines fall 
All in sheer anticipation 

We all fall down to the Earth 
We close our eyes and just collapse
We were present for its birth 
And now we wait for its attacks 

Terror grew out of our heartache 
And it strengthened over years 
Working day by day to break 
All of our spines with crippling fear 

But we can not let it beat us 
We can not let it rule our lives 
We must beat this fear with love 
And we must struggle through the fight 

The fighting might just last a lifetime 
But it is worth it in the end 
As we are fighting for the people 
Who never got to take their stand 


Apr 21, 2014
@ 8:32 pm


I want to let my heart beat 
I want to trust but I’m afraid 
I want to make some memories 
And not be scared that they might fade 

Why would the gods make us so able
Why did they also make us scared 
Why would they put love on the table 
If we don’t have the strength to dare 

You must be strong enough to take it 
You must be brave enough to try
You must be weak enough to let it 
Approach your walls and slither by 

But I want for it to take me 
And I want to feel the rush 
I want to finally believe 
That I can actually find love 


Apr 20, 2014
@ 8:42 pm


I once had a nightmare all my friends were shot dead
Whenever I’m scared it creeps back in my head
We live in a world where shooting’s the norm
And your kids they’re not safe in their school or a dorm
Schools used to be safe, but, so were the kids
But, as the years passed, society slid
Guns somehow made it into wrong hands
Perhaps with guns, there’s not a right man
When people snap they act in such haste
And for once in their lives don’t discriminate 
We pull triggers fast and ask questions later
Any of us, the preps, goths or skaters

It will get to a point, bodies on the floor
When we’ll stop to wonder, what it’s all for
And when the world took such a wrong turn
With metal detectors in places we learnt
Everyone’s guilty of something gone wrong
With the chaos theory and every second gone
What if you realized at the end of the day
If you hadn’t said that it might still be okay
We’ve created a world where guns are the norm
And we’ve started a world stuck in constant storm
So if we reach a day when we know what went wrong
Tell those who have suffered, tell those who are gone


Apr 19, 2014
@ 8:04 pm

Crystal Clear

Love leaves us broken
But we still never learn
As we lie down and open
Waiting just for the burn

Let us face what is clear
What is right in our face
Through the dark and the fear
We were all made to break
We’ve got hearts made of crystal
In our bodies of dust
Was it stupid or wishful
Just to want more for us

Is the pain worth the price
Is the end worth the means
Is a love worth the fight
That tears you at the seams

Let us face what we know
What we should have now learnt
That we’re bodies of snow
In a world where love burns
We’ve got crystal hearts breaking
In our bodies that fade
And the hurt and the aching
Might not be worth that wage

Do you want to be taken
And broken and left
Do you have the patience
To clean up one more mess

It is all crystal clear
It’s all written in stars
We’re just too stubborn to hear
Any warnings on love

It is all crystal clear
Like it’s written in ice
If we can not adhere
Then we ought to think twice

Is a love worth the breaking
Is a love worth the pain
When a crystal heart’s shaken
It will shatter again


Apr 19, 2014
@ 7:32 pm

More Than The Break

It hurts when it’s healing
Almost more than the break
An intensified feeling
Of what’s lost in the waste

And you never know really
If you’ll get back again
To the one place of beauty
You ever found through the flames

You might lose it forever
And that’s what hurts the most
How with one slip it’s never
After getting so close


Apr 18, 2014
@ 8:16 pm

El Sueno

All my dreams start as I fall through my bed
And I fall through the sky, flailing arms, flailing legs
I normally land somewhere I’ve never been 
Surrounded by people that I’ve never seen 

The sky’s never blue it’s always purple or green
And everything is dirty, nothing’s ever clean 
It doesn’t sound bad but they always get worse 
Seem to lull me into fake security first 

Wherever I am and whoever I’m with 
I always get lost and end out at a bridge 
I walk over alone on to the other side 
Where everything’s darker and nothing seems right

Then there’s a building, an old ward or a home
And I get the feeling I’m no longer alone 
I see shadows moving, I hear noises around 
And the moving gets faster and the noises get loud

I’ll walk through the ward, lined on both sides by mirrors
The lights up ahead continue to flicker 
I look into the mirror at the end of the hall
And find that I’ve not been alone since the fall

There’s a man standing behind me, his face always burnt 
He stares at me each time like there’s something to be learnt
This man he scares me, he seems angry too 
But I never understand what he wants me to do

Through the rest of the dream, until I wake up 
I’ll feel him follow like he’s not said enough 
I always wake sweating, like a hundred degrees
Only ever remembering certain parts of the dream

The worst feeling I get about the whole thing 
Is that when I’m awake he is still following
I don’t know who he is or what he wants from me 
But I wish that he would just stay in the dreams 

He’s the reason at night I can’t close my eyes
I am too scared to sleep thinking what if tonight 
What if he wins and I don’t reawaken 
And my life and my soul he has actually taken


Apr 17, 2014
@ 8:25 pm

Call It

I reach out my hand hoping you’ll hold it in yours
The water looks cold but it’s jump in or fall
So I take a risk and bear you my soul
Allowing it all to sink into the cold
I hope that you’ll catch it, I hope that you’ll care
For every last scar and imperfection I bear
I hope that you’ll want me, I hope you’ll feel safe
I hope it’ll be clear by the look on your face
Part of it all, the good and the bad
Is fear you won’t fall or care what we had
I’m  hoping  it won’t all end out like before
The story so old we’ve all heard it before
I’m hoping this time that it’ll all end well
But I know with my record and the previous hell
That that’s not too likely we might have to admit
You should leave me to fall and just call it quits


Apr 17, 2014
@ 7:39 pm


I’ll leave, you’ll grow
Alone you’ll be strong
But when you come home
I’ll still be gone
And when your world crumbles
And your sky starts to fall
You’ll remember our fumble
And the night that I called

He’ll hold you tight
As debris hits the roof
But when he asks if you love him
You’ll tell him the truth
But I’ll always love you
And I remember the night
When the fumble first faltered 
And turned into a fight

My memories still crumble
As you fall away
With a last breath I mumble
Take me back to that day